Someone who is an elusive person will seem to be mysterious and attractive to people around him/her. If you are interested in learning how to maintain an elusive and aloof personality that will intrigue and confuse people while attracting them at the same time, then this article is for you.
At first glance, the idea of deliberately trying to stay elusive for other people may seem like an arrogant and strange thing to do. However, if you think about it, it is not an inherently bad thing in itself. In fact, several studies have shown that someone who is an elusive personality seems to be more attractive and interesting to people around that person.
If you intend to have an elusive relationship with the people around you, you need to keep in mind that the following tips will only work if you are starting interactions with a new social group. If you have already been with a social group for a while now, suddenly following these tips won’t make you elusive to the people who already know you well enough.
So this article is for that time when you have moved someplace new or have started a new job and are interacting with people who don’t know you at all.
In an elusive relationship, you cannot get emotionally close to the people you are around. For example, if you have started a new job, you will have to refrain from becoming attached to your colleagues. However, you also need to avoid pushing them too far away.
You will have to maintain a delicate balance, keeping other people at a specific distance, neither too close, nor too far.
Some basic elements of remaining elusive are; not interacting with people too often (on a personal level), never inviting anyone to your home, refusing invitations to visit others homes or social events. You will have to strive to keep your life a mystery to everyone else, leaving them to wonder what kind of person you really are.
Avoid revealing personal details about yourself. Your life, your personality and your personal issues must remain unknown. Try to avoid dropping subtle or not so subtle hints. If you drop hints from time to time, others will know all about you in no time at all.
Don’t be easy to get a hold of. People should have to make an effort to get in touch with you. This can involve many things. For example, if your phone rings, don’t pick it up right away. Let the call drop and let the caller call you a few more times without picking up. After an hour or three, text back that you were busy and ask what the matter was.
Similarly, if you get text messages from people you know, take at least 4 to 6 hours to reply. Make sure that you aren’t too expressive in your text messages. Keep your messages brief and to the point and avoid using emotional language. If someone rings your doorbell, don’t open the door. Stay silent and don’t make any noise and if it’s night, turn off the lights, so that the person at the door will think that you are out and will leave you alone.
If someone invites you for a party or some other event, don’t commit to going. You should only go if it is an important event with regards to your career. Otherwise, skip all such events.
When you are conversing with someone, avoid saying anything about your interests and passions. Keep all personal details like that to yourself. The point of doing this is to encourage other people to wonder what you really think about different things and issues and what your likes and dislikes are. If they find out what things you like and don’t like and what your opinions are about various issues, you will stop being a mystery to them. If someone urges you to give them a straight reply, tell them something vague and abstract and never give a straight answer.
As mentioned before, while you should make attempts to remain a mystery to other people, you shouldn’t push them too far away. A possible downside of doing that is that other people might start thinking that you are hiding some dark and terrible secrets. For example, you don’t want them to start thinking that you are a killer who hides dead bodies in his basement and that’s the reason why you never invite anyone home.
To prevent such ideas forming in people’s minds, do good things for them at random times. For example, suppose you are walking around your neighborhood and you come across a work colleague mowing their lawn. Instead of avoiding that person like you usually would, go up to them and offer to complete mowing their lawn. Small and random gestures like that, that are under your control and no one else’s, will keep people on their toes and you will remain a mystery while getting on other’s good side at the same time.
The ideas given above are just some tips that can help you remain elusive to other people while still remaining positive in their eyes. You can start by following these tips and over time, you will get the hang of remaining elusive naturally and you will come up with other ways to maintain an air of mystery and intrigue. Eventually, you are bound to succeed at romantic relationships as well as other relationships by using the power of elusiveness.